On Looking for a Job as a (proto) Bluehair

I understand the angst of job hunting. I’ve done it several times, for several reasons (with a partner, to escape a partner), in my comparative youth.

I’m not a blue hair (yet). But I am a boomer. I am a full prof. And I hate where I work. It is a big honking MRU, filled with sharp elbows, big dickwads, and if you could distill the arrogance into a concentrated beverage it would replace the beer at the BigName Corporate Funded Stadium in town (but far more bitter).

My looking for a job is different than the new postdocs, or even PhD’s, looking for a job. Somethings are easier, but there are others that are harder. Why would anyone want to hire a greybeard if they can hire fresh fruit at 1/3 the cost? Most greybeard/bluehairs would only come with tenure, and everyone knows that one puts one’s best foot forward during the interview process. What if I turn into a douche after 2 months? Not only am I more likely to do so than some newbie who is scared scatless over tenure, but then you can’t get rid of me.

On the easier side: I know how to  give a talk. I’ve got money. I’ve got pubs and I’ve got a string of successful students. I can teach nearly anything, but in particular a number of things that no one likes teaching. My CV is already organized (courtesy of MRU, which requires an updated CV every year).

I need to organize a research statement. A teaching interests statement. A philosophy of whatever statement. What I don’t want to do is be a dept chair. Or worse yet Dean. Its time to start looking, and I’m not nearly as excited about it as when I was 26.

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